Monday, August 25, 2014

:)

My face is peeling like nobody's business since last Friday. Whoever can fall in love with me in this state is definitely a keeper because seriously, I can't be more fugly than this (kata saya). I have been trying to avoid meeting anyone at all the whole day today but then nak dijadikan cerita my department threw a makan-makan during lunch hour and I end up meeting practically everyone during the makan-makan session. 

Tak.boleh.lari.lagi.

Sigh.

I just hope that the whole thing will blew off by Friday and everything will go back to normal again before my sister's wedding this weekend. Masak la kalau the face is still peeling during the wedding day - there is no way I can cover it up with make-up - tak kisah la makeup tahap pro macam mana pun. Sobs. 

I still haven't got the time to color my hair, but doing my hair seems pointless now that I look like a wreck. Perhaps I should just schedule an appointment for Wednesday and see how it'll pan out. Kalau malas tak payah pergi.Worse case I'll just buy a box of color and get my mom to help me out on Friday night, the night before the wedding itself. Mi will kill me. Sobs. Dah bertahun kot tak pakai over the counter stuff. But then dah terdesak sangat sangat dah ni. 

*grin*

Lots of things to do. So lil time.

Have a great week ahead peeps.


Sunday, August 24, 2014

Troubling thoughts

Tossed and turned all night and woke up to the lousiest feeling this morning. It doesn't help when I get to bed with troubling questions in my mind.

Sigh.

I try not to over think it but personally its bugging me. Usually I just laugh it off but I don't know why for some reason this time its like a bullet that goes straight to my heart. Its crazy how it made me felt like part pissed part crying inside but I can't seem to let it out. Its like bottled inside.

Are you crying?

No.

*dry smile*

Perhaps I should have. But there were no tears streaming. Just a huge block of pain.

I am sensitive at times. This is one of those times. But displaying weakness is not a virtue of mine.

I need my girls now. And more yoga.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Melissa Shoes? Anyone?

Being a girl, I have a thang for fashion - be it make up, clothes, accessories - of course I have a thang for shoes as well. Who wouldn't love something that makes you feel hot when you strut that cute dress around? Extra inches to make you feel supermodel tall? check! Extra lift to make your ass looks saucy? Check! Heels so thin its a crime not to walk around and feel impossible yet dangerous? Check!

Those who have been sticking around for a while will surely know how crazy I am about shoes. It doesn't matter if its designer or not, I put comfort and class ahead. Especially if its stilletos - kalau tak comfortable sah sah fail la. Pair a good one with day to day wear you can immediately up your look a notch and go from average jane, to hottie on the block.

No kidding.

Well, of late I have been eyeing a pair of Melissa shoes. I am a bit of a sceptic of jelly shoes for a while, but then the Melissa shoes are just too hard to resist! It comes in high heels, flip flops, slip ons, flatties and wedges that can be used from day to night no matter what the occasion. 


Aren't those beautiful????

I can even take them to the office!

They even have flatties - which I love because they come so casual its good to be taken to the beach, my favourite chilling spots!

Anyways, the pair I have been eyeing for quite sometime is perhaps more practical for a cooler climate....


Melissa Drama in Grey

Macam cantek je!!!!! *scream!!!!!*

Omg zalora sale 10%. *grin*. 

I have been contemplating this pair for a while. Cool kan to be strutting the streets of London with this pair? If all those famous celebs can rock Melissa shoes kat sana, I pun boleh.

*gelak evil!*

Plus it comes in a few color options...


Oh my,

Yang pink tu pun macam delish!

With the discounts zalora just made the shoe more affordable. Like!. Now seriously thinking to just impulse purchase a pair myself.

*hears credit card crying*

For more choices of Melissa shoes obviously you can check out Zalora's website now. Go go. Before it runs out.

Laters peeps! Gotta go and checkout my cart now!

Bersiaran di awal pagi :P

Woke up at 6am today so that I can beat the jam and make it to work early.

*winks!*

Kalau everyday macam ni memang terbaik la, boleh dah buat habit practice ashtanga mysore pagi pagi before work. But then you know me....ni hangat hangat tahi ayam je. Nanti in a couple of days I balik la to the snoozing my alarm till 8ish routine macam biasa. My bed is just too hard to resist in the mornings.

*grin*

I was at my desk by 8.15am. Ambik kau! Yesterday when I walked in slightly late the department secretary happily announced to the whole department " Zuraida! 9.45!" and I can only muster a red face and a half decent smile. Oh macam tu eh.....tengok ye.....nanti later dia masuk I nak buat the exact same thing....buat announcement.

Heheheheh.

Okay dalam hati takde niat kejam. Believe me. Ni saja suka main-main.

Its gonna be a long day today.

My boss is away today, so I plan to declutter and recollect on what is due and get it all done. Then there's 730 pm yoga today, in which I don't plan to skip since I haven't been practicing since Monday. Satu hal pulak kalau nanti weekend comes and I start tak boleh nak catch up lagi coz I didn't practice.

Oh and my baby sis is gonna be married on the 30th!!! I'm psyched. Its been long awaited.  I am so proud of my baby sis, she manage to deal with all the bridezilla thingy on her own. I asked her if she needed help but she seems to be hands on with everything and she says its okay....so her kakak got to chill and just float around like the bride. Hahahahaah. The kakak chilled too much to a point that she realised that she haven't sent her baju to the tailor, found out when she wanted to do so last week she actually don't know where she misplaced the kain to be tailored and called her mom yesterday on a hissy fit of a potential wardrobe malfunction on her baby sis's wedding sebab she may have nothing to wear. Classic. Orang lain yang kawin orang lain yang gelabah. I don't know what will happen on my own wedding day. I surely didn't get a hang of it preparing for it the last time and I think over the years I have developed my own kind of phobia about wedding days myself. Sigh. Perhaps thats why I need a super cool baby sis. Nanti when the time comes I just sub everything je kat dia. Muahahahahah. Then I chill, macam sekarang.

*grin*

If only la kan that could ever happen.  

Now I am staring at the bottom right of my laptop screen and the watch shows.....8.53am.

Oh my. Lamanya nak 5.30pm.

Hari baru bermula.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

2 hour traffic to work? No kidding.

Slept a good 12 hour sleep last night and it was amazing.

I woke up chirpy and light as a bird. As I hit the showers I can hear music in my ears and all of a sudden I am belting an unfamiliar tune at the top of my lungs.

The title of the song doesn't even cross my mind. I was just swept away by the music playing in my head and only realise that I am doing a reindition of a KRU oldie when I hit....

"mungkin tak selalu ku lafaz cinta, tak selalu berganding mesra yang kau pinta, membuat hatimu hingga mengalir air mata....."

....hmmm, sad song on a happy morning. Ironic. But the music in my head feels good. It doesn't feel sad at all.

*smile*

I was sent back to earth after having to endure 2 hours on the road in Damansara-Subang-Solaris drive.I made an arrangement to send my submission by hand to my mentor this morning at the Subang airport and the traffic was out of the world crazy. Seriously, how on earth do Subang people go to work in KL everyday in all that traffic? Its practically not moving en route to KL, its just insane.

Kan best kalau boleh jalan je pergi kerja. No traffic. No hassle. Just morning air. 

Ni tak. Dah la traffic jam, construction left and right. I heard the MRT beam under construction somewhere in Kota Damansara fell of the rails (err rails? ke track? ke runtuh macam tu je? betul ke?) the other day and that there were casualties - indirectly maybe I pun a casualty jugak sebab the mishap somehow may have contributed to the bad traffic today, wallahualam la kan.

Arrived at work at 9.45am. With the reasssignment of cubicles at work thats bad bad news. 

Gotta make an effort to walk in earlier next time.

Its mid week. I am definitely looking forward to the weekend. Gotta clean my crib and run errands all weekend and I am psyched. 

Laters.

xoxo.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Writing from the heart

My final paper submission for the semester is finally sent for print and bind yesterday. It was a major relief - considering I have been struggling with writing it the past couple of weeks. These days writing comes to me as a challenge - it has been 6 to 7 months of mental block and feeling lost when I even attempted to write. Staring at a blank screen for hours is freaking depressing. I am brain drain and tired - its so exhausting just to even think about it. Tu belum kira the frustration I face when I read a journal....I can feel the words bouncing off my head as if it were hitting a brick wall. So yes, being able to finally get my drafts finalised and ready for print in time for it to be graded is a huge thing.

To come to think of it maybe I have been struggling with writing because deep inside I no longer have the heart to do what I do and continue studying. Perhaps the excitement to complete my studies had dimmed, reaching a point where I start questioning my original intentions. The fact that I did the paper out of fun in the first place is not helping - after 2 and a half years its no longer fun. Its stressing me out. I have to admit that there are days when I just can't believe that I ever decided to do it in the first place - that there was a point of time when I thought it was a good idea and not listen to my ex boss who said "seriously Zuraida, are you sure about this?".

Hmmm. Back then I replied "yeah, it should be easy peasy".

Boy I thought wrong.

Even worse when you get the "what were you thinking doing this thing out of fun" look from anyone who heard about it - as if macam its not common to further studies. Seriously chill la people. If I am the kind of person that goes through the normal life cycle of habis degree-dapat kerja-jumpa chenta hati - kawin and beranak pinak maybe I wont be what I am now and doing the things that I do now. Just because I chose a different path doesn't mean I deserve the "you're out of your mind" look.

Sigh.

Well I did a bit of light reading last night. Never read the author before but it was recommended by a friend, so what the heck. Anyways, there was a chapter where the author wrote about writers block and he mentions that in times facing mental block (in which writers do - I suppose its a work hazard), it doesn't matter that you can't write a single word, what you have to do is keep on writing from the heart. When you are done writing with the heart, then you fix it with the head.

Okay that's not a direct quote. I rephrased that. But thats the gist of it. I can't remember every single word. There are other funny bits that's quite deep (and sometimes dark) that made me forget the other deep and not so funny bits of the book.

Look up Pendek Mabuk Gila by Ahmad Kamal Abu Bakar if you have the chance. Its a good read. I enjoyed it. It took me only 2 hours to finish the whole thing. That's a record there I tell ya.

And then again maybe the author was right....maybe what I needed is a bit of heart. But then the question is, can I do technical writing using my heart?

Agak payah disitu kan.

:P

Zuraida, you gotta have heart in what you do. Its referring to doing the writing itself, not the content of the writing per se.

Hahaha. Deep la kononnya.

Laters.