Big Hooray As We Hit Pass the Half Year Mark....

.....I wish to be thankful for;

1. Having blessed with a very understanding family - who endured all my whims and whatnot over the years. I have to admit I am not the easiest person to get along with at times but my family had always always been there.

2. Great set of friend - whom I wish to be able to see more these days than being stucked in the office/class - I miss the gold old days when we all just hang out and have fun/bitch/laugh (of our bosses, life, a mad driver on the road or whatever, heheheh!!!)

3. Great people at work. I have to admit that work is more fun and challenging, and I enjoyed meeting new people who keep me buzzy and running all day tirelessly (okay, I am not saying this just to kipas but fact is I might chatter up and down endlessly about work lately but hey, I hate to admit it, I am loving work - so beat it!).

4. Results that empower - at work, in study. I wish I had the capacity to do/give more ; but I am but human. I err but blessed with rooms to improve, so I am grateful for the opportunities to learn and grow and continuously watch the fruits of my labor ; hopefully such labor benefits not only me but many others out there.

5. Good food. Comfort food. Oh what a blessing - though its a pain on the mirror and the weighing scale.

Alhamdulillah. Life has been kind. Its not without its pain but silver linings are evident.

I am definitely looking forward to ;

1. Completing my studies - though I am already at snail pace and I am super worried all the time about how it'll end up , because seriously, there are moments when I actually questioned myself and how the hell I will ever complete my doctoral paper but perhaps if I keep calm and slowly work things out all might not be in vain....so patience....

2. Ramadhan - hip hip hooray to trimming down some kilos! Desperado dah ni.

3.Finding a way to resolve my potentially never ending work misery (oh work and me have this love-hate thing so I am kinda 50-50 on what I do like all the time) ; hopefully sooner rather than later. But for now I'll settle with a pat on the shoulder - kudos darling you did fine you go girl belives - and start to figure out the solutions....calmly.

4. Starting yoga again. It might just help with the stress, but the thing with exercise is you always have this heavy lazy attitude every time you want to kickstart the exercise again and my heavy lazy attitude seems to weight a mountain.

Gila la loser. Sigh. I wish I have my very own personal Kevin Zahri to kick my ass everyday and whip me out to shape.

Well a girl can dream la kan?

5.This year's long vacay. Crosisng my fingers and dreaming of being on hot air balloons while taking on a breathtaking sight.

Hold on to the thought. Its so positive it might just pull you through the rest of the half year in a breeze.

Keep calm, smile and happy thoughts.

xoxo.

Panic? Hell yeah!

At times like this I thank God for the existence of  Starbucks.....

......because no matter how bad a day it is I can always use a good cup of coffee.

The day had been a busy one, despite the fact that its Friday and almost the entire office is on a holiday mood. I was feeling buzzy myself, until I sat on a 2 hour meeting dissecting my most recent project that's due for finalisation (like what? yesterday?).

I think I was no longer (pukey) green or blue - but rather white as hell when I found out that...

....there's still about 40 more slides to go before this episode will ever end;

....there's still changes need to be done to the original (ever-changing) excel version because we (again) found another loophole;

*as if there were no loopholes before, sigh*

....there is a need to re-work certain stuff because apparently I am sitting on a goldmine of information but its haphazardly everywhere....grrrrr!!!!!!!

But that's not the worst part.

Wait for it....wait for it.....

Guess what? This thing will never end because now it has to be periodically updated.

I wanted to laugh, but I suppose I turned pale and white instead - and I only realised that I am displaying horror across the table when my boss says "its okay, there's no need to panic just yet...." and so he goes with mitigating statements to cushion the blow.

Meeting was ended with one statement...

"Its okay Zuraida. Take your time to do it. You can send it in piecemeal so we can look at it while we are all at home over the weekend. It'll be a great reading material".

Yeah. I suppose will do. Gotta go back to it then once I finish this cuppa.

xoxo.

Island piccas!

It has been a crazy week - but I have to say it had been a good one. Was at Singapore for work and gosh, how the place had changed since I have been last but what I got excited about was the view from the new office space...

Breathtaking isn't it? Too bad I didn't get to snap the other side of the building overlooking the docks. That is a good one too.

From the island filled with skyscrapers, I changed two flights within the next 12 hours since I left the island of the lions to head up north west to another local sanctuary. 30 minutes drive and a boat ride later I arrived at Perhentian Islands....

Crystal clear waters.

My favourite.

Was there with friends for about 4 days. Taylor Swift's RED album on loop the whole time.

True - pure state of grace.

I came back with a super dark tan.

Thank heavens its not a burn.

Definitely recharged my batteries and ready for another challenging quarter. And a new semester....after all the drama last semester that has almost driven me to a nervous wreck.

*winks*

Can't wait till September. *grin!!!!!*

xoxo.

On anxieties....

I hate to admit that to some extent, I (like many urbanites these days) experience stress related issues the likes of anxiety disorders. Extreme pressure leads to stress, which brings (to a point) panic attacks - and later on - excessive worrying, OCD's and the list goes on. There was a point of time that my body seem to go on a "cr for help" mode when such stress later translates to health issues like excessive migrains, athma, insomnia, gathritis etc - before it actually came up to a certain point of insanity - and after going through a phase (or two) of such occurence, I no longer felt that its something uncommon or to be taken lightly - we all live in a stressful world and stress management should be done wisely.

And of course, there is nothing to be ashamed in getting the proper treatment to deal with it. After all, there is no such thing as being too crazy for anything. Its even crazier to know that you have a problem and not do anything at all.

Back to me, yes I have anxiety issues and for a while now my friends are quite supportive of it. Most of them  know that despite my relaxed, non-chalant and laid back exterior - I do have a breaking point - so I don't stress myself by worrying too much of things that are not related to me, I compartmentalise stuff and live in a happy place so that I can face my ever so stressful days at work. 

Until lately I befriended the ultimate diva and drama queen.

Usually a friend of mine will pick up my dismissive traits and my non-interest to on-going conflicts and drama - but not this one. I suppose I have dropped clues along the way that I am somewhat not interested - there is only so much drama a girl can take in a day, or a week or a month - but this friend of mine keep on going on and on and on. No offense, he has a good heart - a big kind heart - but it doesn't help knowing all other's people problems in school and diving into issues that pushes me negatively ; I try to be uber positive and compartmentalise as much as I can and try to stay in that happy place of mine - but then I am not into drama.

Over the past few weeks I have been hearing tonnes of other people's drama that at some point, I am starting to judge and screamed "go get a grip!". Talking about toxic people around you. Sigh. Now, I am just shaken.

Oh my, anxiety level one has kicked in.

Sigh.

I am starting to feel uneasy. Definitely uncomfortable, pain in my chest.

I can't focus,

I am short of breath.

Its so shitty it felt like I am shunned in a closed space when in fact I just got back from the best 4 days at the beach.

Sigh.

Breathe. I can get through this. 

Minggu terbang ke awan biru

It ha been a tiring 3 days as I rush between KL - SG - KL - KBR - Perhentian....and in between flights, I have traed suits and my laptop bag with a backpack and totes - waiting on to board en route my next destination, Irealised I forgot one of the most important thing I must have while travelling.......

MY SUNNIES!!!!!!

sigh.

Tak larat nak marah dah.

So tired.

Oh Im called to bored. Sayonara!

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