Monday, September 17, 2007

If there is anything that we could change in life....

Ever thought of being able to turn back the clock and change a decision/event/situation?If there is anything that can ever be changed, would you go back through time and change it?

Obviously there are zillions of us that will grab the opportunity at first chance, but hey, before we actually do it, shouldn't we consider if our lives is good enough now and that, hey, whatever shit that had happened before, it's not worth all the trouble to go back and change it?

Though I am (at some point) content with my life, unfortunately, I am among the zillion people who would die for the chance to undo the things that I had done before....at least if not many, a few things...hahahah (you ungrateful *****!!!)...sigh!!!...yeah, at times when I sit back and think about all the what-if's-that-could-have-had-happened-if-I-have-done-things-differently, it kills me inside...especially when the what-if turns out to be better than what I am now....huge sigh!!!

If there is anything you can change, what would it be?

I have come to this "things" of my own....if only I could change....

1. My degree....
I wish I hadn't done accounting...I wish I had listened to my dad, became an engineer....petroleum engineer, maybe, even better I suppose than civil.....and earn a lot more dosh than I am making now....

But there is one cons to that - I get bored easily with Science!I don't understand shit about chemistry (and there goes my petroleum engineering dream) and I hate to go to sites...that job is supposed to be left to man and man alone....the dust, the noise, the heat....it'll kill me...

Or maybe I should have defied my dad more...and though without a bio credits in my transcript, just insist on doing medic and get a degree in medicine the hard way and become a doctor. Just imagine me... a doctor....in white rob, saving lives....but then I don't think that will work out either...it'll be just to depressing for me to memorize everything in the human body that I might either end up dropping off school or settle and becomes a shrink...hmmm....

2. What I do for living...
With my accounting degree comes my cursed auditing and accounting life.....I wish I can do something I enjoy, rather than something I am growing to dread day in and day out....

Yeah...i'm just exaggerating, my life is not that bad. After 5 years I have come a long way...I should suck it up and be grateful, hehehe.Maybe one day I will come across my dream job, whatever it is....I am still figuring it out...

3. My eating habits
I think its a bad thing that I grew upfeeling bad of not finishing what's in my plate...and over the years I have piled up tonnes of weight just because I inssist of finishing my food even when I am full.It's bad enough that I am a food lover, and seek comfort food when I am depressed, or when I am very very happy.....that's too much reason to be associated with food. sheesh!

Despite the things that I wish to change (hahahah!wishful thinking)....I would not trade my family, my friends, my love history.....I have to admit, they contribute a lot to what I am today and how I function as a person, so without them I am nothing.Of course over the years we get disconnected, parted by circumstances, but I keep them close to my heart. If ever our path should cross again I will be deeply overjoyed.

*Thank God I am not a person who hold grudges, I forgive and forget over time, so even if I am meant to bump into my worst enemy in times to come, I will still feel happy!!

**P/s: That doesn't mean I am glad to meet my ex's...they are the lst person on earth I would ever want to meet.

Would I be happy if.....

1. I am a housewife?
Hmm.. that's a tough call...not that I will not be happy to give up my day job to play homey housewife 24/7....

It's just that knowing me, I'll get easily bored. Sure, we will have all the time in the world focussing on ourselves and not minding everybody's business, but even when I was on holiday, the longest I can stay still at home was 2 weeks, what will happen to me if I have "the rest of my life" free? Think about it....too much time with nothing firm to push me...so not good....

2. I am a mother?
Definitely! Who wouldn't want a kid? I love kids, they are adorable, especially when they are around 3 years old....anything above that please take them away from me....or let me leave them to their dads, hahaha..

*I am yet to develop my maternal insticts, but yes, I believe it will be fun and cool to have kids. I want 2 of my own.

3. I get a better job?
Hmm...what job is that?

4.I get to travel all over the world all year round....
Ooohhh..I love this one. I love travelling.....I would not let go of the chance if I ever get one...

Of course, if I am married and has 2 kids it'll be a bit fussy, but I would still love to travel. New places and new faces sometimes uplift my mood....


We can play the what if game all day, and the answers will all be about maybe's...
I guess its best to live the moment and take one step at a time....because there is no way in the world that time can be reversed...even if we can change them, we still would not know how much difference would it made to us, so yeah, maybe its best left as it is...

3 comments:

kurekuredalamperahu said...

baru tadik dapat berita one of my friend mengandung. jeles tau!

haaiiii..bila la dapat kawen nih...

Zuraida said...

adakah kawan mu itu kawan ku jua??

takpe beb...coming soon la tu...dah bertunang, tak lama lagi kawin la...

kurekuredalamperahu said...

ni kawan masa uni dulu..baru je kawen awal tahun haritu..