" If a man insisted on always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it" - Herodotus
After a week long break I thought I can open a new chapter and finally start dealing things at work more effectively but as soon as I step into the office things get overwhelming again and I start losing grip of myself. That's been happening a lot lately, and to be frankly speaking its pretty depressing. Of course being positive natured I always tried to see the upside in many things but its kind of difficult to express my situation right now as I am yet again over the edge. At one point, I felt like I am out of control, and all I could do is to go with the flow and get things done as much as possible but yet again a lot of other things tend to creep up and I am yet again sucked in a deeper black hole than before. The thing is I am not alone. I bet a lot of people I know the is feeling the same thing.
I am trying to find a balance here. Something I can work on and grow from there. I suppose I am a bit confuse now, and partly retaliating perhaps, but I am trying to make the best out of it. Its easier if I would have found a way to be more happy about it but somehow repressed emotions don't really work well with motivation levels - in which at the end of the day the lack of motivation does contribute to decreased level of interest and drive.
Sometimes I think I should be more selfish and focus more on my needs but that is not the solution. At some point - like today - I wish there are more hours in a day, more energy and motivation to do things , more peace to do what I need to do - but no matter how I tried the moment I need to clock out there are still countless things that is still undone and piling. Its tiring. And I just got back from a holiday.
Yeah it has not been a good day.
Bear with me. I am trying to let this go. I'm sorry if I what I have given is still not my best but if I don't have the space and time I won't have the means to get what I need to do done.